Mistakes by Mackinley Clevinger, February 7, 2016
There comes a time in any man or woman’s life when they look back upon something they’ve done, something that they thought, at the time, was a good idea, or perhaps weren’t even thinking very hard about it while they went through the motions, that causes them to, after the fact, think back upon what they did, and realize that they have made a horrendous mistake that may very well be irreparable, and, without the barest intention of hurting another individual, has caused quite the splash in the otherwise tranquil lives of those around them.
This is known as a mistake, and is a common syndrome of being human. We’re not perfect, not by a long shot, and things go wrong from time to time that shake us out of our comfort zones and mess up whatever normalcy we had managed to produce within our own lives. Sometimes these happen because of our negligence, sometimes there was nothing at all that we could do to prevent them. Either way, at some point or another in our lives, we are going to experience one of these, and feel that we may well be to blame for it. There are a few important things to be aware of when you’re experiencing the effects of having made a mistake.
When such a situation comes up, we have a choice to make; a choice that many people make passively, without thinking about it; a choice that is incredibly telling of the nature of a person, of who they are when faced with adversity and responsibility. Do they take responsibility for what’s happened, accept that they had a hand in the event, and spend their efforts trying to repair what’s been broken? Or do they make excuses and try to pass the buck so somebody else, liberating themselves of the guilt and trying to make somebody else fix it for them?
Many people, when faced with the unintended consequences of their actions, balk at taking responsibility for themselves. They didn’t intend to break the peace that had formed, or to get in anybody’s way, so in their minds they are absolved of guilt by writ of not meaning to make the mistake in the first place, and they carry that thought further to say that they shouldn’t have to fix the harm that was caused, because they weren’t to blame. They get so caught up in clearing themselves of guilt that they forget that the laying of blame isn’t the important part of what’s gone on; what’s important is responding to the formed crisis, not figuring out where to point your finger.
When a human makes a mistake, which, by its own definition, means they didn’t mean to do it, they have to fix it. It’s as simple as that. Dodging the imaginary blame-bullet or trying to redirect attention elsewhere won’t get anyone anywhere, because it still leaves you with the same mess as before, only now everyone is less willing to do it because you’ve associated fixing the problem with having caused it, instead of focusing on making things right again.
In rejecting responsibility for our actions, we make the situation that we have created worse for ourselves and for those around us, something that any rational-minded person should avidly avoid doing. Accepting that we played a part in the event that upset the regular balance and doing something to restore a sense of normalcy and order to our life is the correct and proper reaction to making a mistake, not denying both our part in it and any responsibility to fix it.
We are all human, and that means living a life made up of the good and the bad; of successes and mistakes. We can’t control when we’ll make a mistake, but we can control how we react to them, and that is the telling aspect of our lives, not the fact that we made a mistake in the first place. When, inevitably, an act of negligence or poor fortune leads to a crisis that demands immediate attention, don’t stand idly by telling the air that it wasn’t your fault. You can take a road that gets you nowhere, skirting around responsibility and standing idly by during crisis, or you can take a path where you actively repair and mend the broken things you come across, leaving a whole and happy life behind you as you walk ever onward. The choice is always yours to make, what kind of person you want to be.