Head Games I by Mackinley Clevinger, January 29, 2016
“My average day, sir? Uhm… I suppose it typically starts with-“ Hand over hand, pulling me higher and higher up a cliff wall that refused to end. “-with… waking up, and-“ A dozen faceless men striking at me, barely able to keep up and block their attacks. “-and doing those morning errands we all do. Then, when I’m employed,-“ Standing beneath a freezing waterfall, fearing the inevitable failing of a limb that kept me from being shoved into the hard rock. “-I would rush straight to work and-“ Hammering. Tedious, unending hammering. I like the hammering. “-well, get to it, I suppose.”
Mr. Cadavacie eyed me over his glasses, and made a neutral grunt. “And in your free time? I like to know my employees very well before we sign anyone on.” He clacked the papers in his hand against the desk and looked at me, straight on. The accusatory tone he employed seemed to be second nature to him. “Surely you do, or enjoy, something besides your work, yes? I hold no illusions that everyone is as passionate about this line of work as I am, and your references don’t seem to fall in line with most of the positions currently open.”
I breathed an internal sigh of relief; I hadn’t lied this time. “Now, Mr. Brindle, while several positions do currently lie open here, you seem to have a particular interest in… in packaging our product? Being down there on the floor lifting heavy things for hours straight?” A comfortable warmth settled over my mind at imagining having that job again. Sat still, a sunny day beneath a tree on a hilltop, birdsong and a slight breeze. I can breathe, and relax. “No such positions are available, and I hesitate to suggest any apologies from myself for this happening.” Clouds rushing in, the wind whipped up into a frenzy, terror. “Excluding recent events which I can wholly understand, you have a startling history that places you on a much higher level than at the very bottom.”
“If… no position was available, then why did you-“ Trapped in a dust storm, barely able to see my hand in front of my face. “Call you in? Because we’re short-staffed here, and applicants aren’t exactly lining up to start working at a water processing plant.” He sighed, and laced his fingers together. “Mr. Brindle, several highly sought after and very important positions opened up here recently due to a tragic incident, and we need them filled sooner rather than later.” The storm subsides and I watch a thick fog pour in all around me. Shapes appear, shifting and distant. I take a step forward and look at the nearest one, confused. This is different.
“Yes, well, due to the… due to the nature of how those positions were now found to be empty, we’ve found it hard to find willing applicants to fill them. I assure you, Mr. Brindle, personally, that their disappearances had nothing to do with our line of work, and were incidents relating to their personal interests outside of work. That is one reason I asked about your habits; if I’d known of the habits of your predecessors, perhaps something could have been done.”
I start running towards the shape, gradually bringing it into more focus, tendrils of the fog gripping at me and resisting my efforts. I can see the shape, almost, the outline of… someone. Definitely human. I try to take another step, but the fog is too dense, I can’t move. “To the best of my knowledge, they were involved in a joint-camping trip that went awry for them all, that’s all anyone has been able to discover. There is absolutely no threat to anyone who would be filling their positions, and yet finding an applicant… I do apologize for the subterfuge in bringing you here, Theston, but we need to have our plant functioning at peak performance.” I strain my eyes, trying to catch even the smallest glimpse of what lay beyond my sight.
The fog dissipates, releasing me. The form I had been trying to make out is gone, and I’m left in a dark wood, the barest twinkling of stars able to be seen between towering pine trees. I’m lost, and I know something is in the woods, looking for me. “That is why we have a second applicant joining this interview session. Do you mind?” He rose to open his office door, startling me as I rushed back to reality. I tried to process what had just gone on, what I’d been doing. “N-no. Not at all.” I looked around trying to grab onto something to ground myself.
I was in an office, in the middle of an interview at the water processing plant for Port Sindwill. I was looking for work after- A brawl, I- wait. This is a memory, not- I shook my head. Not important. I needed work. I wanted something boring and monotonous, not… “Wait, what position are you-“ I called after Mr. Cadavacie, but the door slammed behind him, cutting me off. I was alone now. I worked my jaw, trying to recall what part I’d played in that conversation. I’d… been asking a lot of questions. Why had he answered? He was the interviewer; he was looking for an employee. Someone to do the work and shut up about it. Hammering, endless- At least, that was my experience with it.
I was sitting in one of two chairs, the one closer to the barred and misty window that let yellowish light in without any details going either way. Another window looking into the plant lay beside the door, stretching from it to the wall, almost. The blinds were down. Isolated, alone, the trees an impenetrable wall around the clearing I stood in. Something was in the woods, it knew where I was, it had me where it wanted. I blinked again, focusing on the desk. A computer terminal, large and bulky, sat on one side, the rest of the surface taken up by various sheets of paper and folders.
There was a solid, steel trunk with a padlock in one corner, and the rest of the wall space was taken up by shelves overflowing with folders and scattered paper. Someone else was here with me, not the thing stalking me. She stepped in a circle, following the sounds it made as it circled the clearing, seeming to listen to it, nodding. I looked at the logo on the back wall, behind the desk: Sindwill Water Processing; one of the several such plants that made the lifeblood of Port Sindwill. None of them had been hiring, I would’ve preferred any of them to here. Already, this place… triggered me too much.
The door creaked open. “-I heard from your father just last week, and he says he’s doing quite fine. Wanted to know how you were coming along at school.” Mr. Cadavacie stepped through the door and stopped at his desk, turning to face me and- It was here. I spun around, desperately looking for what I knew to be right beside me. The girl laughed, no longer walking in circles, watching me. “I, of course, neglected to mention what we had agreed on. Please, have a seat, Sharra.” I stood in the dark, hearing something whirring beyond my sight. I could see the girl, comfortable and grinning at my panic.
“This is Theston Brindle. Theston, this is our other potential hire, Sharra O’Connely. Do introduce yourself, you’re quite likely to be working together if everything goes well for you both.” I turned to see a young girl, far younger than I’d expect to be working at a plant in any supervisory position, take the seat beside me and reach out her palm. I took it and nodded at her, managing a weak smile. The creature, of such assumed beauty and majesty, turned its head towards me. In its body I could see fluidity and power that would combine to create art of motion, but in its eyes… “-here, Mr. Brindle?” I blinked, ghost whispers of what she’d said drifting as mist in my mind. “I’m sorry?” I saw something change in her eyes at my saying that, something- But in its eyes lurked a deeper power, something reserved and calculating. Something to be respected, and feared. I stood back, looking at the beast, and bowed at the waist. “Oh, aren’t you the gentleman. Most men I’ve met can’t help but make some silly comment about my age, or how I’m doing at school, or some similar piece of deprecating shit.”
“Sharra…” The warning tone in Mr. Cadavacie’s voice was almost fatherly. The trees closed in again, locking us in the midnight glade. I saw a lantern, casting light that banished the darkness away. A figure swathed in darkness stood over it, surrounded by the wounded and scarred, warming them in the lantern’s glow. The girl, Sharra, danced along the edge of the light, darting in and out and laughing mockingly at the figures reliant on its warmth. There were other lanterns, distant and weak. I didn’t know where to go. “Sorry, Denzel.” She said, bending over the arm of the chair to set her bag beside mine. A thousand stars in the sky, and I was looking for a set of them in the shape of- Sharra sat upright and grinned at Mr. Cadavacie.
“Sharra…” A slightly deeper edge that demanded a respect not of familial love entered his voice. Sharra cleared her throat. “Sorry, Mr. Cadavacie.” Her face flushed, but didn’t show any other outward signs of emotion. “We are trying to be professional now, aren’t we?” Mr. Cadavacie sat behind his desk again, looking at the piles of papers on his desk. “Yes, Mr. Cadavacie.” The edge I had seen in her eyes towards me was non-existent while she watched Mr. Cadavacie. “Now, if we may begin again, from the start. As you are both aware, two positions have been recently vacated in our plant that need filling. A supervisory management position, and head of accounting.”
“The plant lost its Fixer? How?” Mr. Cadavacie peered over his glasses at Sharra, in the same manner he had done to me in my interview. “Sharra, not all of us here are as knowledgeable about the plant’s inner workings as you are. Please keep that in mind.” Sharra jolted, and turned towards me. She stood between me and the lantern, jaw set and arms corssed. The figure controlling the lantern lifted an arm, and Sharra stepped aside. It wanted me to come closer. Distrust and wariness were evident in the way she looked at me. “Then why-“ She started. “Mr. Brindle possesses numerous attributes and characteristics that make him an ideal choice for the management position, Sharra, much as you possess the traits needed to fill the accountancy position.” He let steel enter his voice at those last words, eyes resting on her, daring her to challenge him.
Sharra watched my tentative approach with unconcealed anger. I stepped past her carefully, afraid of what she may do. Sharra turned back to Mr. Cadavacie, a complaint on her lips, but only let out a sigh when she saw his face. She crossed her arms and looked out the barred window for a moment, before turning back to Mr. Cadavacie. “You told me I was here for the… for the management position.” She swallowed, trying to hide her disappointment. “Ms. Connely, this is, if you will recall, a business. Mr. Brindle here has, himself, suffered some disappointment at realizing we could not entertain his own specific requests, but has forged on admirably. I cannot let our personal relation nor your father’s position interfere with the smoothest running of this plant. If Mr. Brindle is more qualified, then that is that, as it were. I believe you will find the accountancy position a perfect fit once you’ve been engaged in it for some time. And, of course…” Mr. Cadavacie leaned forward, glaring at Sharra. “We wouldn’t want anyone to know about this little arrangement now, would we?”
Sharra aimed her head at the floor, trying to hide the heat rising in her face. “No, Mr. Cadavacie.” She glared at me out of the corners of her eyes, clenching her fists. I ducked past Sharra, hoping expediency would help soothe the beast, and approached the lantern. The scarred and wounded beneath it parted at my approach, watching me warily. I coughed into my fist, unsure of what to do. “Yes, my apologies, Mr. Brindle. We can discuss this further at a later time if need be, Sharra.” He turned towards me, pulling a folder seemingly at random from the piles of identical folders on his desk. “Have a look at this, would you?” He passed the folder to me, and I looked inside.
Water. Streams and rivers, lakes and tributaries, all flowing together to achieve a balance. I stood above it all, watching the water move smoothly as it integrated itself into new regions. It was nice. I could handle this. My sight flashed back to the folder as I passed it back to Mr. Cadavacie, watching him nod at something I’d just said. “Good to hear. Sharra, here is your dossier, have a pass through it, I do feel the job is well suited to your talents.” I looked at the folder I’d apparently gone through, and compared it to Sharra’s. Hers was much larger with sub-sections and what looked like recent reports. The sun disappeared as a coarse straw bag was shoved over my head and tied into place. I fought against it, getting a few fingers underneath the drawstring and elbowing whoever had placed it there.
“Well, Mr. Brindle, our accountancy here is a very involved and well documented department. We’d hate for a mere oversight to require a formal investigation into our plant and waste everyone’s time.” Mr. Cadavacie grinned at me as I tried to keep a straight face that didn’t betray my confusion at what had happened. “The previous holder of the management position did not accrue as much paperwork as he perhaps should have, but I could never fault him for the effectiveness of his work. No…” Mr. Cadavacie looked down at a sheet of paper in front of him, a personal letter that was stained and wrinkled. “I couldn’t fault him for his effectiveness. I’m sure if you felt there were a lack of proper documentation of your work, you could rectify that when you take up the position. Is everything in order, Sharra?”
The annoyance and anger had drained from her face as she read through the folder, flipping through it rapidly and absorbed in the task. She looked up from it, “Still checking, sir,” and returned to looking through the documentation. Mr. Cadavacie nodded and turned back to me. I tried to work the bag around my jaw, slowly widening the space offered by the drawstring, but an unseen hand forced the bag back down over my head, and my fingers lost their grip. “Mr. Brindle, I hire other people so that I don’t have to know every little detail of their departments, and I’m afraid the best person to ask that question has disappeared, presumably lost to us forever. Now, before we finalize this… I feel you are going to fit in here splendidly, however I would like to ask you one question about your potential work. Supposing-“ The ground shook, the water trembled, and a section of the riverside broke off and fell in, sending the course of the river into a frenzy. Waves collided and splashed onto the shore, the smoothness of the scene lost as the directions of the rivers and streams fought against each other. “What would you do?”
I watched the flow of the water from above, a chaotic mess with no hope of fixing. Every flow of water fought another and created further complications, always sending a force towards the larger lakes to upset their tranquility and create little whirlpools that grew steadily larger. The balanced system was gone, and I was supposed to bring it back. I dropped, having no real substance in this place, and drifted towards the initial incident where the shore had fallen in. Here the inflow of water was redirected by the gap, colliding against itself and creating the chaos running rampant in the lakes. How was I supposed to- “I understand you don’t have much experience here, Mr. Brindle, and perhaps it has been-“ I interrupted him. “Sir, just a moment, please.” The earth that had fallen into the river had been washed downstream, causing further conflict as it created obstructions in smaller streams and tributaries. I needed to fix this. I needed to fix all of this.
“Mr. Cadavacie? You should see this.” Sharra was looking at a page in alarm, the very last page of the folder. She passed it towards Mr. Cadavacie. How could I do this? This wasn’t normal. This wasn’t the hammering, or anything else I was used to. I looked at the obstructions to the smaller streams, causing them to dam up and nearly overflow. They needed to be moved. “You mean he knew? Why didn’t he tell-“ I wasn’t there, though, I didn’t have my body to work with. What was this? I needed to fix the system, but how? “-must’ve got to him before-“ What did I need to do? I needed to move it, shift the mounds that blocked the flow back to the gap that was causing the current to fight itself. I focused on the mound, imagining it move. A small clod of earth broke off. “-if they’re making a move-“ I felt a trembling sensation race through me, a strain on my mind that I could only compare to the use of a muscle. I twisted my head around, trying to recreate that feeling. “-and you’re hiring a stranger-“ I found it. The mounds blocking the path of the water flew up into the air, colliding with one another as they sailed towards the shore where they’d come from. They landed with a thump- “-no other choice-“ -and the water’s chaos began to subside, returning to the smooth peace it had been.
I grinned at Mr. Cadavacie, aware I’d just said something but not entirely sure what it was, and saw Sharra behind the desk with him as they looked over the folder she’d been given. They both looked at me blankly, Mr. Cadavacie eventually responding. “Yes, well done, sounds like you’re the right man for the job after all. This interview is over, you start tomorrow, congratulations and all that. If you would be so kind as to leave now, we have a small matter to look into that requires privacy.” I tried not to let my face betray worry that I’d missed out on something important while I reached for my bag and stood up to leave. I stepped into the light cast by the lantern, keeping my distance from its occupants, and looked at the towering figure swathed in the dark its lantern banished. It wanted my allegiance.
I stepped towards the door, practically forgotten by Sharra and Mr. Cadavacie again already. Sharra stepped forward before the lantern and knelt immediately, looking at the figure’s feet. She was comfortable here, had played these games before. I looked behind me, at the distant lights, and watched them die out one by one. The light cast from the lantern behind me grew brighter as each died, lighting up the forest glade until it touched the tree line. It stopped there, blocked. I opened the door, thoughts racing from all that I didn’t understand. In the light stood broken lanterns, surrounded by gravestones. I turned back to the figure, to Sharra. Gravestones stood here, too, the most prominent lying before me. Sharra knelt beside one, an ornate book its only marking. The other gravestone was blank.
“But how did they find out who-“ I stopped at the door, and turned around to face Mr. Cadavacie. “Shush, Sharra. Yes, Mr. Brindle?” Mist poured out of the fresh turned dirt before the gravestone, surrounding me. The form I’d tried to make out still lay before me, blocked by the fog that stopped me from moving further onward. I struggled against it, barely gaining an extra inch. The form was moving, walking, holding something in its hand. “I assure you, Mr. Brindle, that if anything comes up that you need to know to do your job, we will inform you of it. This-“ He gestured towards the folder, “-is nothing for you to concern yourself about at this time.” The mist sank back into the grave, and I knelt before it, examining the freshly turned soil. “Mr. Brindle, I am not so disposed towards you as to feel obligated to answer that. Good day, I’ll introduce you to your expected duties tomorrow.” I stepped through the door, Sharra’s remark making it out with me before it shut. “He’s an odd one, where’d you find-“
I made my way through the factory’s upper floor towards the exterior doors I’d come in through, trying to make sense of the interview I’d partaken in. I’d been, well, gone for most of it. What was I even being hired to do? I stopped at the steel doors that would take me outside, and tried to collect my thoughts. What did I remember from reality? I’d wanted mindless drudge work, and was going to be the plant’s manager, somehow. Sharra was young enough to still be in school, but was going to be the head of accounting. She and Mr. Cadavacie knew each other, apparently. What was in that folder she was looking through? Hell, what was in mine?
I put a hand on the door, ready to push it open. I didn’t even know half of what I’d said in there, too busy caught up elsewhere. Some of it was standard, but the mist was strange. And the lantern… Something was going on there, that much I knew, but I had no clue what exactly. I was used to spending most of my time away from reality, but I felt like ignoring what I’d experienced like I usually do wouldn’t be a good choice. Dozens of vibrant balls flying through the air, my arms barely able to keep up with them as the juggling act went on. There was definitely something going on here, more than the job. But- My hand twitched, missing a falling ball. I panicked and tried to keep the rest in the air. I tried to piece something together, figure out what I found off about- They plummeted to the ground, bouncing and rolling in every direction. I lost it, and sighed. I’d figure out what was going on eventually, no doubt.